Insider Series: How Flight Attendants Find Love in the Air
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I love my job so much that I take time to write about it and share the experience with all of you, my readers and fans. What’s interesting about the flight attendant lifestyle is that it does indeed present us with special circumstances when it comes to love and relationships, both on and off the plane. Here are my answers to some of your burning questions about how we manage to find love in the air.
Isn’t being a flight attendant difficult on a marriage/relationship, particularly if you have children?
It really depends on both parties because being part of the cabin crew can be great for a relationship — we have more time off than most people do, which means more time at home with our loved ones. We have access to great travel benefits, which help make vacations more frequent — we’re also able to visit destinations that aren’t feasible for most people because of constraints related to time, money or both. That said, if one or both parties in said relationship have any insecurities or trust issues whatsoever, then yes, it can be difficult to the point of being impossible.
As far as children go, it pretty much works the same way. I know a lot of colleagues who love what they do because it affords them more time with their children than most parents — as well as the occasional-but-regular timeout from them. But if the person you’re raising your children with (or your child for that matter) doesn’t do well with you being gone so much, it can of course be difficult to deal with. That being said, most of my colleagues who have kids can’t imagine doing anything else. They get more time at home with them and are far more hands-on than other parents. Plus, all the travel benefits and flexible schedules mean we can take our kids further afield than Walt Disney World when it’s vacation time, which is far more educational for them and more stimulating for us.
Do flight attendants date pilots a lot?
The quick answer to this is definitely no. We don’t date pilots any more than anyone else dates colleagues in their given work environment — movies like “Catch Me if you Can” certainly make it look like that may be the case, but I can assure you the reality is quite different. I will say that dating someone within the industry can be quite advantageous, as they’ll understand all too well your crazy work schedule and bizarre sleeping habits. On the other hand, if you don’t manage to fly parallel schedules, you’ll see each other even less than a normal couple. At the end of the day, although it’s a romantic idea that harks back to the heyday of leisure aviation, the truth is that we don’t date pilots any more than we date each other, which is also a pretty rare thing.
Do passengers hit on flight attendants all the time? Do you know flight attendants who have gone home with flyers?
Yes and yes. Again, some people still have very romantic ideas about the cabin crew, and will sometimes act on these feelings on the plane — I have at least one passenger on almost every flight who I would classify as flirty. That said, I tend to work on mostly international flights, which means I have more time to interact with my passengers, so I imagine this might be a bit different for some of the domestic divas out there. And yes, it’s flattering so long as the flirting doesn’t begin to border on being inappropriate, which can happen quickly and of course become very uncomfortable for all involved.
As for going home with passengers, you have some crew who have done so in a rather illicit fashion à la Ralph Fiennes, and then you have people like my colleague Maike (not her real name, of course), who met a gentleman sitting across the jumpseat from her on a 747 to New York back in 1978 — they’re still married today and have three beautiful children. So yes, we do go home with passengers, sometimes for a night, sometimes for a lifetime. It depends on the passenger, I suppose.
Have your own questions? We’d love to hear them! Let us know in the comments section, below.
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